Lindsay Lohan

Last Friday, LiLo reportedly scaled a wall in an attempt to get into her ex, Sam Ronson' sister's party. Here she expresses how particularly proud she was of her feat. Well, maybe she should have taken greater lengths as such to win back Sam's heart.

Johnny Depp/ Joaquin Phoenix

The New Joaquin knows how to make a friend feel 'better'.

Lindsay Lohan

We may all know she already has a real Twitter account but wouldn't it be funnier if she really wrote what was ACTUALLY on her mind?

Guess someone's not going to go lessy anytime soon.

Amy Winehouse

I'm not sure if this is the lyrics to her new album.

Anyhows, I can't wait for it.

Madonna

Madonna can't adopt the Malawian kid. Madonna finds an alternative.

Levi Johnston/ Sarah Palin

Every boy will have to face a terrid mother-in-law and one mother will have to face a terrid 'was supposed to be' son-in-law.

Rihanna/Chris Brown

The love birds are very much still at it. If love means getting punched,bitten and bruised then I must be very mistaken about what I share with my parents and partner.

Michael Jackson

For everyone wondering where in the world is Michael Jackson now, he is at home, alive, well and Twittering (and also eBaying).

*Note the Lock Icon. This is top secret!